Thoughts of a nerdy feminist (idemandjustice) wrote in roleplayers,
Thoughts of a nerdy feminist

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Sometimes it sucks to be the paladin

I'm fairly upset right now, and I need to vent. But I'll cut this at least, as I don't know how long this post is going to be.

Why do so many people think Lawful Good = Lawful Stupid? Why do people insist on playing Chaotic Neutral in what they're told is to be a game with very heroic themes, and then when playing good alignments, still play as if they are Chaotic Neutral?

I know, the game is for the players, not the DM, someone here has said. But that's not true. It's for EVERYONE's enjoyment, and the players knew what the theme was before they came in.

I'm not running the game. My husband is. It is a D&D game, in a world of his/my creation, in which he recently finished a three year long solo game for me, and I have a novel I'm in the progress of writing that takes place in that world. It's our baby. It's very dear to me. One loose didn't get tied up in the big long game, and my husband thought it would be fun if we sent a low level paladin into it, that I would play, and he wanted to run it as a multi-player game.

So he invited some of our friends who play almost exclusively White Wolf (LARP) with us, and we always have had a lot of fun playing with them. He told them they'd be traveling with a young Squire questing for her Knighthood, and that she (I) would be leading the quest. I'm the only Lawful Good character, first off. There is ONE chaotic neutral character, as my husband didn't want more people than that to play that alignment. Another chaotic good, and three Neutral good characters. All of these other good aligned characters are indistinguishable from Chaotic Neutral.

One of the Neutral Good characters suffered an alignment change to Chaotic Good, due to her actions. She is a cleric of a Lawful Good deity, so that was not a good thing for her.

I suppose I'll go ahead and get into the argument in question. We're all on a ship. A storm is coming. The ship is a really good ship, and it can take the storm REALLY well (due to magical enchantments on it). The god of the seas in this world is a Chaotic Evil god, and known to be evil, and my husband pointed out to the guy playing our navigator that typically sailors will drop a few coins or something into the water in order to appease the evil sea god. Now, we'd been at sea for two months with no problems. I want this to be clear.

My and the cleric make religion checks after the Navigator brings this up. The DM tells us that our faith feels that sacrificing to an evil god is NOT a good idea, as any attention we receive (being rival faiths) will be negative attention. Both of us succeeded this religion check. Yes. Both of us. Succeeded. Clear?

I mention this, as the Cleric isn't really making an effort to argue against this idea. I simply state, "We really don't want to draw that god's attention to us." The Chaotic Neutral guy doesn't bother to acknowledge that I spoke, and leaves the cabin, braving the storm, to leave an offering anyway.

The Cleric then says that she thinks we need to leave an offering to this evil god, and that we might bring good attention from him onto ourselves. Which is clearly NOT what the religion roll told her. At that point, her alignment switched to Chaotic.

I was so furious I didn't know what to do. So I did the slightly bitchy thing, I admit. I prayed, out loud to my god, in everyone's presence, that he please forgive us for what my companions had done. I was asked to pray more quietly, and threatened. These people are supposed to be under my leadership, but they don't think ANYTHING about ignoring me outright when they disagree with me. A very heated shouting match followed, in which the guy with the chaotic neutral character did mention OOC that he was loving the role-playing amongst us. I felt a little guilty at that point.

IMMEDIATELY after the offering was dropped into the water, a Kraken took hold of our ship and destroyed it within a few rounds. We fled on the dingy.

For the rest of the game, the other chaotic good guy bitched at me that not everybody worships my god (no shit, but not everyone worships EVIL gods), and that some people do things "differently" than me. They also made OOC comments about my character's stupidity for the rest of the night. And they joked that the mercenary who'd been hired would probably charge my Knighthood extra for being "forced to listen to her crap."

In after game discussion, they again talked about how stupid lawful good characters are, but how that's not my fault for playing my character well. (Frankly I don't know how to feel about that, as I think my character was right.)

I can honestly say that this game tonight was not, by any stretch of the imagination, fun for me. The quest surrounds my character, so simply bringing in a different character wouldn't be the best choice, and frankly I don't feel I should have to do that, as the players were told what sort of game it was meant to be before they joined.

One person said that he thought the lawful good deity that the cleric and I worshiped was hypocritical for abandoning the cleric in a time of need. (Her alignment shift caused her to lose clerical abilities... big shock...) I tried to tactfully point out that it could be viewed as her abandoning her deity, but that was dismissed.

As I said, I'm not having any fun with this, and I REALLY don't enjoy the constant OOC comments about how awful my character is. I really avoided telling them how upset I'd become out of character, because these are my friends. And that's the thing. As far as I can tell, I should consider them all dishonorable and untrustworthy, and should go on with my quest without them. And since the quest surrounds my character, that would kill the game, which I don't think would be fair to them. Arg. I'm really frustrated.

I'll try to stop venting now. Please tell me I'm not being a whiny, selfish bitch, please...

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