Uluru Desta: Wild at Heart (rainbow_lioness) wrote in roleplayers,
Uluru Desta: Wild at Heart

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The Viper Faction - Cure for Vampirism

From an original recipe by Bellinor
Duval, of House Diamecht


  • Daylight

  • 1 Wooden Stake (sharp)

  • Consecrated vial of water (blessed by a representative of the deity of
    your choice)

  • Small silver hand mirror

  • Clove of garlic

  • Bottle of good quality red wine.

Optional Ingredients:

  • Small to medium size band of pitchfork / torch wielding local peasants.


  1. Ensure the daylight is fresh. This recipe has been known to fail if poor
    quality light is used.

  2. Collect the remainder of the ingredients in a stylish off the shoulder
    bag - Hessian is NOT an option no matter how many sequins you add.

  3. Check you look still look dazzling in the hand mirror.

    Tip: Use the wooden stake to prop up the mirror leaving both hands free to
    adjust your attire if required.

  4. Add a cup of wine to fortify the spirits.

  5. Take one rickety, horse drawn handsome cab (black) to the imposing
    gothic, cliff-top castle of the Vampire. Be prepared for a traditionally bumpy
    ride through a windswept forest.

    (Note: For a truly authentic flavour, you may like to add a dash of
    lightning, lashing rain and a wolf howl or two).

  6. Knock on the castle door and ask to see the Maaaaarster

  7. Allow the lackey to lead you to the Crypt and consume a glass of wine to
    steady the hand.

  8. Knock politely on the coffin lid and wait patiently for the Vampire to
    awake. Vampires are notoriously late risers.

    (Note: Some 'new blood' vampires may not have had time cultivate an eerie
    creek to their coffin lids - please feel free to add one vocally if you

  9. While consuming the remainder of the wine with the Vampire, engage them
    in polite conversation. Suitable topics include; the weather, the
    unavailability of virgins and grooming tips for werewolves.

  10. Allow the Vampire to simmer for 10 or 20 minutes until fully at ease.

  11. Hand him his eviction notice for breaking the terms and condition of his
    lease - to-wit. Keeping of unlicensed wild animals (the aforementioned
    werewolf), failing to keep the property in good order (the place looks like it
    hasn^Òt been swept in decades) and the storage of noxious substances (Igor).

  12. Apply a sprinkling of the holy water to your forehead so it appears you
    have been exerting yourself.

  13. Check you still look dazzling in the hand mirror.

  14. Meet your adoring public.

  15. Throw the garlic away

I was in an RPG chat room, and a character came in, when I looked at the profile it said that he was bitten by a vampire but then later on was 'cured' somebody else sent this to me.
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