What we have started to notice, is in any of the games that he runs, his wife has PC's that are far more over powering than everyone elses, and she doesn't know how to play them. She constantly has to ask us, what does this power do? In some of the D&D games its 3-5 levels above the rest of the party, in like OWoD - its about 50-70 xp difference. It also comes with NPC allies and contacts like there is no tomorrow, that even break the bounds of what the NPC types should do (illithads making deals with drow; archons parrying favor; ect.) In actuality its not just his wife he does this with - he was dating the sister of someone in the group, and she got the same treatment until the group had to split when she didn't want to be in a relationship anymore. (As an fyi, me and my bf are the two other ST/GM/DM that still run other than him, and none of us really do give special perks to each other characters that are not given to other players, I play a Taftani in his M:tA game, but at the same time I have so many draw backs it balances out to be equal.)
To the most part this wasn't a horrible thing, about the time that I started to move down, he started putting together drow games (about 7 of them) all with the same people, just different parts of the main game. I'm playing an exiled highborn drow/soulknife of one of the collapsed cities of the realms, and working as a merc for this house who (Gm's wife is the matron mother). We're trying to oocly teach her how to play a drow, because she hasn't learned how to, at the same time most of her characters have no initiative at all to do things but follow the rest of the party. We're like ok, we get to start showing her how to do things, and we decide that oocly to her watch what our pc's do and see how to actually play drow. We go at this for the whole game session. In the mean time myself and my boyfriend are looking at each other over the table and debating silently how much we should be handicapping our PC's for the sake of teaching a new player. Its gotten to the point where I've told the ST that I'm going to bring a new PC to the next game because the soulknife/highborn is too much in conflict. I.E. the matron mother of the house is so inactive and messing up that by all means she should wrestle control of the house away from her - if it we're not for the soulknife(me) and the ninja(bf) she would have handed over much of her house to other forces.
The other thing is on the side the Gm runs things for her that no one else get to be involved in. To the point that the game has started to be compared to an interactive video or Xenosaga I where the plot passes on by us if we do anything at all or not. We dont' really have plot but random stuff that makes no sense because we don't get to see things. To the point when I brought up to the GM that my soulknife really should be taking over the house, even while we are trying to teach her how to play - I get told that if I do that Lolth will kill the pc on the spot (where by the source materials, supporting the weakness she should be killed for by Lolth anyway) thus I've asked to bring in a new PC as I've been placed in a point where the PC is killed if I do, killed if I don't. When I mentioned that based on the PC's back story this is what she would do (which we're written by the GM), I was told that my PC didn't have a back story that she was just some peon. Despite the fact that the game has been running for over six months with the back story in place and understood by the rest of the players since it was brought up by the GM. Something that happened at about the same time that the back story was removed, the GM suddenly changed how NPC's react to my PC. They used to recognizes her as a highborn, she actes like one and dresses like one, and now they barely notice her at all.
On another note despite this is a drow game, we we're asked not to pick an evil alignment, so most of us are some form of N, I think the whole party is CN. We we're sent to the surface to find out why supplied from the surface quit coming. While we are there the ninja with the help of the soulknife starts to take over the thieves guild that was hired to kill the party. We're doing it as compensation for the goods and money that we're the property of the house that was given to them to kill us. We get told by the ST that we've crossed the line and that we're playing CE PC's at this point. We haven't sent them against anyone, but just taking over to claim what should be ours. At the same time, NPC's in here are being termed non-combatants. They are trying to kill our PC's but any attack we do is marginalized and they still exist. To quote the ninja, - if I knew we should be playing surface races in this game I would have just made a surface pc. (in reference to how un-drow like our pc's are supposed to act).
Since he lightly complains that he's been the main ST for so long, we're trying to run other games so he can play for once. Because everyone wanted to see a Drow game finished the group asked me to run a game. I agreed to it and started a game, at the same time when I was supposed to start my game, we showed up and he started to run *his* game. Where I had plot and dungeons all mapped out for the group, this threw people but we just went with it I just pulled a double shift at work so I let it go. At the same time, because I wanted to be more true to the concept of what a drow should be (females clerics, males wizards/fighters) I made a gestalt game. I started the session we created characters, everyone showed me their sheets but said GM. Everyone else followed the guidelines of the race, he even made sure his wife picked cleric for one of her classes, then made a female pc that wasn't a cleric and then made both his and his wife's pc members of the first house of Menzoberranzan, without asking.
At this point we came to a bit of a stalemate on ideas, since everyone else is so non-confrontational, I decided to do so on another point. I shifted my game, that since we had one drow game (his) that was about to go on hiatus, that I would run a second game myself on the surface (I didn't know before I moved down here he had shifted all of his games into underdark, and half of the players we're getting sick of this - as I found out when I picked up the MMV at the gaming store on sale, and the group was with me) - I was going to gestalt the game like before since the group is so small (about six now) so that we would have all the classes covered that people could at least play something they liked and something they needed. I asked people to come with their ideas so that we could just start gaming versus sitting around for a while in pc gen land. Said GM got a hold of everyone except me and my bf, and had them make single class characters and balanced out the party without telling me. (I work 3rd shift, and left me a message when he knew I was sleeping, and wouldn't be up until everyone had their stuff done and we're already driving to my place). At the same time, he's also called everyone up and canceled a game that I only realize was canceled when no one appeared at my place 3 hours after game was scheduled to start. Which didn't bother me except that I was running it, and the only reason it was canceled was that he wasn't feeling well (I don't know if anyone else wanted to play at all, but he just told them game was canceled) - which would have been nice to know since its in the evening, I had spent time cooking for everyone to have two people for the food to feed six.
At the same time, I've had the group (those not sick of underdark) come up to me and ask what happened to my drow game because they actually wanted to play an actual drow game not one that was handicapped like his was. They know that I mostly play WoD/Amber outside of D&D and think I could do it properly and are really disappointed that its not being run, but understand the situation.
This puts me in a bit of a bind when it comes to how to deal with this, its getting to the point where its extremely un-fun to play in his games nothing against his wife but when you're pulling gods and threats of PC death to keep us bowing to her PC when she doesn't care either way - and the stranglehold that he seems to have on the group, and his lack of respect of other GM/DM/St's in the group. I don't know what to do.
I've promised the players that after drow got a rest and we could get ride of some of the underdark resentment that I would start up the game, but when he ignores the rules for PC creation and hides that fact I want to just write the starting characters for them but I know players that are not him don't like that and don't abuse the rules that much.