Alex-chan (alexmegami) wrote in roleplayers,

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So I ran Exalted on Friday, which was rather entertaining all on its own, but I felt I had to share the following story, which was told entirely in-character...

Me is me (the ST).
Azure is an ex-pirate cannibal Lintha Eclipse Caste. Simon is his player. Azure is telling the new Night caste his life story.

So when I was younger, my family and I were pirates. We did all the usual pirating things: raiding villages, burning them to the ground, pillaging their stuff, eating their fallen warriors... you know... the usual. And, I mean, you've got to hand it to the human spirit... they just kept rebuilding their cities, so we could come back and raid and raze and pillage their stuff. And eating them. But then I got thinking, and I said to my brothers, "you know who's making the real killing here? The contractors that they call in to rebuild the city." And, to be fair to my brothers... they went to the contractors' city, raided it, burned it to the ground, pillaged their stuff and ate them. It was awesome. But it still wasn't enough, you know? I said, "no, no, see, what we need to do is make some cheap shit that everyone needs for really low prices, then sell it to them at a huge markup. That's how we'll really make a killing. And then, they'll sell the stuff to other cities at a markup, but we'll sell it to those cities for a 'lower' price, and we will make enough money to rule the WORLD."


But they still didn't really get it, so I took a ship and sailed to Nexus and now I work for the Guild. *giant, toothy shark-man grin*

Simon, did you just explain that Walmart's > Piracy?

...yes, yes I did.

Okay, so it amused me...

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